You know those aggravating 'inspirational life tips' that functional people (or those pretending to be) are intent on writing? I just spent 5 minutes on google finding you some wonderful, genuine, tooth-grinding examples. They go something like this:
- Feel more, think less
- Smile more, complain less
- Rest and be thankful
- Relax, dont worry
- Meditate, dance, find time in your day for a few precious moments of peace, stare out the window at the sun on the leaves, take off your shoes and feel the grass underfoot...
(Although obviously remain consistently motivated, goal driven and strive relentlessly to actualise your dreams, because you must also...)
- Stop holding yourself back
- Make your life a masterpiece (because you only get one canvas)
- Conquer today and repeat tomorrow
- Remember that pain is weakness leaving the body
- Be grateful for all of the obstacles in your life
...And most importantly...
- Cut out sugar, just cut it out. Like a mole. Then cut out wheat, and dairy, and tea and coffee. And be thankful for the invigorating sense of self deprivation you're now able to enjoy.
I can't take it! It's exhausting! It’s impossible! I refuse!
Here is my favourite cake. You bake it, with wheat and sugar. Then you melt more butter than old ladies put on their scones and you pour it over the whole thing. Then you pour more sugar (and cinnamon) on top.
Then you make a giant coffee, you sit at your cluttered kitchen table at 2am and you eat, and you drink, and at some point during the whole delicious business you'll notice the earth is still turning on its axis, in a galaxy of over 100 billion stars, in a universe of potentially 500 billion galaxies. And (despite your deeply entrenched baggage, all of your foibles and that nagging, unwanted extra 3kgs) you've already won the game, you are now the master of that universe. Because you have cake and you have coffee, and you, and your coffee, and your cake are all alone in a little warm kitchen.
Smug and happy.
1/3 cup butter
1/2 cup caster sugar (although I've used regular sugar and it's worked fine too)
1 tsp vanilla essence
1 cup self-raising flour
1/3 cup milk
For the topping
3 Tbsp butter, melted
1 Tbsp sugar
1/2 tsp ground cinnamon
What to do
Preheat oven to 180 degrees C. Grease & line a 20cm cake tin
Beat the butter, caster sugar and vanilla essence with an electric beater until pale and creamy.
Add the egg. Beat until well combined.
Use a large metal spoon to stir in half the flour, then the milk, then the remaining flour.
Spoon mixture into tin and bake for ~25 minutes or until golden and cooked through (mine too longer last time I made it. To test if yours is ready, stick a clean knife in the centre of the cake. The knife should come out clean)
Leave it for 5 minutes, then turn it out onto a plate, brush it with the melted butter, mix the cinnamon and sugar in a little bowl, and then sprinkle it all evenly over the cake.
(best served with strawberries!)